Tuesday, February 22, 2011

I Was Using Numbers and Stuff...

 Brian Regan said it best, " Hey, look at me! I'm a moron. I wasn't even close. I was using numbers and stuff...Cat. KAT. I knew there were two Ts."

Sometimes  ALL the TIME people don't know how to spell. It drives me NUTS and makes me laugh at the same time. I don't know why I choose to be an interior design major when CLEARLY I should be an English major. My biggest spelling pet peeve in the WHOLE WORLD (yes I've traveled the world teaching English..duh.)  is the word your. I literally clench my teeth and twitch a little bit when I see a text message that says, " I hope your okay." It just is one of those things...fingernails on a chalkboard if you will. Also the word definitely does NOT have an A. It's not definately...it's DEFINITELY. Holy cow I am on a rampage.
So...to calm my raging grammar annoyance I chose to channel my inner anger to a more positive effort-making fun of people who can't spell...
Do enjoy these misspellings and ALWAYS remember to use spell check.
(Now I'm going to have to make sure I spelled everything correctly...)

This is just sad.


"It must be Italian!"

Is there a limit on how many times I can be a violator???

...Or make signs while drinking and driving


I want to be the managership!

Monday, February 14, 2011

V-Day and the Utah Wave

Today was Valentine's day, and either you're happy about it, or you're miserable. Frankly, I don't give a rats *cough* about Valentine's day because of 2 reasons. Reason A: I have never had a real Valentine, nor do I expect one anytime in the near future and you know what?!? I'm TOTALLY fine with that. I'm not a gushy gushy gal. And reason number next: Valentines day is just a way for candy companies to make mucho dineros and for everyone to have an excuse to wear red and pink all day without looking too gay. I hope you're gathering that I'm not a huge fan of Valentines day, especially when it's the main topic of the facebook world. I mean C'MON people. Isn't there anything more exciting to post as your status???

Soooo....After my color theory class, Miriam, Emily and I took a well-deserved trip (not so much on my part because I'm a regular) to the Cocoa Bean. I mean, why not? We asked ourselves. I bought my FAV-the Ultimate Brownie-one for me and one for me, I MEAN Lindsey....and then I bought my fav drink-the cocoa bean chocolate frappe, but this time there was a serious miscommunication and the girl gave me brown water. BUUUUT I can't really complain much because it was free...yes, I did use up my punch card already....don't judge me.  As we were sitting there enjoying our insane calorie intake, a monstrous wave burst through the door and blew everyone to the back of the cafe....okay not really, but this lady had some MASSIVE hair. I like to call this hairstyle the "Utah Wave." Of course I HAD to snag a sneak shot, and with the help of Emily's impressive phone camera skills and the unknown cooperation of the "wave wearer" this shot was beautifully captured. Ah the joys of hairspray.

Behold...the wave.

This cupcake says it all

Miriam had a rough Valentine's day. She scraped this sucker CLEAN

What my drink was supposed to look like....

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Cocoa Bean and Skull Candy

I'm sorry to say, but I think I am COMPLETELY obsessed with the Cocoa Bean. For all of those who don't know what the Cocoa Bean is, how are you still living? Basically it is a "Mormon Starbucks" as my BFF Aubrey put it, where all their drinks are made with cocoa instead of coffee (said with a New York accent) . Today I had the white raspberry frappĂ© minus the white but plus milk chocolate. It was DELISH! They also have amazing cupcakes, with crazy flavor combinations. My favorite is actually not even a cupcake...its called the ultimate brownie, and holy frick is it the ultimate brownie experience. It tastes like a party in my mouth, which is a cupcake flavor there surprisingly enough... Anywho...back to my main point. Obsession. I collect the stickers that come on the drink cups and cupcake boxes and put them on my door. I'm pretty sure they're not all mine....at least I hope they're not all mine...hmmm...maybe that explains why I am always out of money......
Count them...18 stickers!!!

The other day I was sitting in my textiles class bored out of my FREAKING mind when my pal T'Jae was casually scrolling through whiskeymilitia.com. Now he had introduced me to this website awhile back when he let me listen to his brother's insane headphones which were purchased on that website. So you can imagine I just HAD to get my hands on some of those! After some research, and to my dismay, I found the dream headphones averaged at a price range of $45-60. :( Bummmmmmmmer. So I moved on with my life. BUT in this before-mentioned textiles class when we were supposed to be paying attention to some lame fibers or something, T'Jae had the brilliant idea to check the website and BAM there they were; my dream headphones glowing on the screen in all their bassy glory! AND the best part- $16.00. *wipes a tear* OBVIOUSLY I had to get'me some of those so I did, and so did T'Jae. (compulsive internet shopper... we don't judge) After waiting patiently for 2 days they were safe and secure in my hands. But I had to wait for an entire 2 hour drawing class to open them. I swear they were sitting there burning a hole into the top of my desk.
As I raced home and ripped those suckers open (and by ripped, I mean RIPPED. They sure don't want it to be easy for you to open them) I plugged in the 'pod, cranked the bass, and had a musical experience unlike any other I've ever had. My ears were front row at a Kanye concert bumping along to the heavy beat of "Heartless." I was in love.

My firstborn

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Ice Veins and Lesbian Cars

Today as I was walking across campus in the -30 degree weather (probably closer to -20, but who really knows these days?) I couldn't help but notice how cold every single part of my body was getting. I mean this weather was SOUL NUMBINGLY FREEZING. So cold my blood vessels felt like a tiny Jamaican bobsled team careening down my ice-like veins. (they won gold medal of course) As I passed many genderless people with all gender-distinguishing features covered up with hats, scarves, and coats I saw a guy wearing only a mere jacket-a wind breaker if you will. I bet he was saying to himself, " Don't worry everyone, my ego will keep me warm." Moron.

So on to a more positive note, raise your hand if you think Subaru Outbacks look like lesbian cars. I mean, dude, c'mon. They totally do! Can't you see one getting out of her olive green Outback wearing tevas and carrying her canvas bag of organic produce? ( Please don't be offended if you fall under one of these three categories: 1: Lesbian, 2: Teva wearer, 3: organic produce buyer.)

Which brings me to my next point. I don't understand why so many people are crazy about those "environmentally friendly" grocery bags. Firstly, who is going to remember to take them to the store every time they shop? Secondly, all your groceries are jammed into one bag creating potential meat juice spillage onto produce, which doesn't make a good match. And my favorite part is the fact that there are SO many plastic bags already created, so technically they aren't saving much. Sure sure the phrase "kill a tree or choke a fish" is commonly said about paper and plastic bags, but I would just rather not look like one of "those" people carrying my stained, freaking nasty bag around with me up and down the aisles. But...whatever floats your boat.